Do I like Christmas This Year?

Christmas and I have an interesting relationship. Sure, I like the idea of Christmas. I like spending time with family, particularly those I don't get to see as often. I like making cookies, and eating delicious food. I like giving gifts. I like decorating and crafting. And when it's cold outside, it's even more fun staying in and cross-stitching or sewing. The Christmas season can really be a happy time of year.

But sometimes...

Christmas just gets on my nerves. I've never really understood why. Some years I find myself despising the very things that made me so happy the year before. Last year I was angry that people were decorating and planning for Christmas so early, but this year I was getting excited as soon as Halloween was over, and I had to force myself not to put out the tree until after Thanksgiving. Sometimes I procrastinate my gift-shopping until late in the season because the idea of going to a store makes me want to hide under a rock until January. Other times, I'm thrilled to get my shopping done early, and I'll have present wrapped and under the tree by early December. So why does it fluxuate so much? Why do I hate Christmas sometimes? I've just never understood where it all comes from...

...Until now.

I've recently realized my love or hatred of Christmas is directly related to one thing: White Christmas.

The song that is.

I have a completely irrational hatred of the song White Christmas. It comes from when I was a kid. For some inexplicable reason, I cried every time I heard it, even before I was old enough to remember it now. When I got a little older, I remember thinking it was so sad. I pictured someone looking out their window at a dry, dirty, cold world and longing for snow. I imagined them thinking of past Christmases and sadly wishing they could be there again.

See, I kinda want to hit this guy. I know, it's awful!

My older sisters thought it was hilarious, of course, so they constantly sang it to get me to cry. They even learned how to play it on the piano. One Easter was completely ruined for me. After happily finding all the eggs and going through my basket, I was putting on "lipstick" with the Robin's Eggs. You know, where you lick the bright colored hard coating and it will rub off on your lips. My favorite color was blue. So anyway, there I was with bright blue lips, all happy and smiling, when one of my sisters walked over to the piano and began playing a song. It took me a minute to realize what song it was, but once I did the tears began to fall.

I believe that I would have grown out of the whole silly thing had my sisters not been so mean and used it against me for years. I don't usually cry when I hear the song anymore, but I get really unhappy and sometimes angry, which is probably exactly how I began to feel towards my sisters each time they sang or played White Christmas. Now those feeling will always be associated with what is probably a beautiful Christmas tune. And I think I've finally realized that every time I hear the song, I like Christmas a little less.

Last year, I was not a fan of Christmas. Everything seemed to annoy me. And last year, it seemed like I heard White Christmas every time I walked into a store. I know I'd already heard it 5 or 6 times just in November! I went to a concert of my mother's choir, and they sang the song. My mom didn't even tell me they had it in the program, so I wasn't expecting it at all. It was pretty awful. And as a result of hearing it everywhere I went, I couldn't wait for Christmas to be over.

This year, I've only heard the horrible song once. I was waiting for Matt to get our food at Long John Silver's/KFC when it came on the radio. I was able to inconspicuously cover my ears and sing Here Comes Santa Claus under my breath and there was no problem. I'm really excited for Christmas this year, and I think it's all because it's been a White Christmas free season.

There are certain things that will always annoy me about Christmas. Commercials start playing way too early, and it angers me that materialism has completely taken over the holiday. When people die on Black Friday so that little Susie can get her Barbie for $2 off, it sickens me. But the season can be completely wonderful, too. People can really come together to help those less fortunate, and spending time with friends and family is always great.

I just think if they banned White Christmas I could really focus on the beauty of the season, instead of wanting to pull my hair out!